Is it wrong to have a physical relationship before marriage? Is Sex Important in a Relationship?

Sex is the instinct of the body. Some of you are in the urge to experience uniting with your partner’s body, soul, and mind. However, you must be confused about whether it’s wrong or right. You must be thinking about what’s more important society norms or instinct. Explore the consequences of being in a intimate or physical relationship.

Impact of physical activity on the relationship

Physical relationship before marriage impacts us physically and psychologically. In India, getting involved in a physical relationship before marriage has both pros and cons. It is important to understand both sides before you decide for yourself. 

Its impact is subjective hence no single theory can be generalized to all individuals. It’ impact depends totally on the cultural-composition, emotional – psychological state of the two individuals in the relationship.

• According to the research of professor Ahalya from NIMHANS Bangalore, partners who are involved in physical intimacy feel obliged to get married later though after few years they realize that the relationship is not working for both of them. The individuals after physical intimacy fell trapped. After the act of lovemaking, the couple starts ignoring the major flaws in the relationship and works to make it successful.

• For some individuals involving in physical activity is just a matter of lust. It’s just a one-night stand. It doesn’t matter whether they love the person with whom they are physically involved. For the other person, it is an act of love and a bigger deal. You need to be sure about your partner’s intention. The expectations and intentions of the partner involved in physical intimacy should be the same. If for one partner sex is an emotional act and for the other partner it is just a physical act then it’s a problem. In this kind of discrepancy, there is a chance that either one or both partners get hurt.

• Sex follows a bell shape curve i.e. it begins with an upward curve which means that initially the couple enjoys being in a physical relationship then it flattens into a plateau. At this stage, the interest in sexual activity stays stagnant, and then finally it goes down. During this phase, the interest starts reducing. Hence if the couple gets involved in premarital sex then later on they had to take measures to keep their sex life active. 

• Though premarital sex brings momentary fun in life however it causes emotional troubles like shame and guilt, low self-esteem, self-doubt, paranoia, distrust, sexual dysfunction that can develop after many years of marriage. 

• Risk of pregnancy.

Is Sex Important in a Relationship?

Sexual compatibility is important in a relationship. Physical relationships increase emotional bonds and closeness between partners. Being intimate helps you to know more things about your partner which you could not be discovered otherwise. It tells how assertive, gentle your partner is. It also tells about how much your partner cares about your needs.

Sex before marriage allows couples to discuss and share their sexual fantasies and then evaluate whether they are compatible or not. This will eliminate the chances of mismatched sex drives and bad sex life later after marriage. Physical relationships increase emotional bond and closeness between partners however this decision needs to be taken carefully considering all the points mentioned above. 

If you feel that physical intimacy is an issue in your relationship. You are not able to make your partner understand your concerns. You are not able to trust your partner. You are not able to say him no. You are not ready for a sexual relationship and it is causing anxiety then do consult a therapist.