I have a very low self-confidence. How can I improve myself?

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      Whenever I talk to someone new, I feel uncomfortable. I am very lacking in confidence. Because of this I think negatively about myself and I always feel that I have a lot of flaws. I will not be able to do anything in my life. People will not think well of me. Because of this I am not happy. I am currently in college but do not live as openly as others. However, I am good at studies but I have a lot of difficulty in talking or expressing myself on any issue. Please help me


      Hello Sourabh

      Let m tell you building self confidence sounds very difficult but it is very easy when we try to think positive about ourself, feel positive about ourself. If some bad experience happens in life we usually blame ourself about it and start finding negatives in ourself, rather than focusing on what could be done to improve the present situation. Every person in his/her life makes many mistakes, which is completely fine. No one is perfect in this world. But we can improve ourself by learning from the experience by accepting things happily and positively. If someone criticise you then then use it as a tool to deal with it. Your life’s remote control is in your own hands. If you want to change yourself then you have to take control of your life by yourself only and determine that you will do what you want to do. By putting all your efforts to achieve it. Its not in your hand to control the circumstances but your response to circumstances and your behaviour in situations is in your hands. If you respond positively then you will have positive results i can assure you that.

      First of all you have to accept yourself the way you are. Each and every person is unique and good in there own ways. You must have some special qualities that makes you unique in this world, feel great full about it.

      There are many techniques which can help you in building confidence –

      * Dress yourself good, compliment every day to yourself while looking into the mirror.

      * Write down your positives and you achievements of yourself on one page. And paste that page on your wall.

      * Write negative things on a page and think about what can you do to improve it and then write down what solutions you find out, through the page of negative qualities and keep the page of solution with you. Read it frequently.

      * Always try to look constantly in others eyes while talking to anyone, with a smile.

      * Listen music, dance with yourself if you like.

      * Do sit for 20 minutes daily for meditation, it will boost your confidence.

      * Make 2 new friends daily. It could be anyone, child, old, teenager…

      * Every day do 3 kind things. It will boost your confidence to another level.

      * Fix small goal for yourself and complete it, don’t take a big goal as a whole, divide it into parts and achieve it in parts.

      * Go to park for a walk and do some exercise.

      * Talk to people you feel comfortable with. If you feel uncomfortable in talking to anyone try to figure out what is making you feel uncomfortable. (Mail m your answer).

      * You can do one good exercise that close your eyes for 2 minutes, and focus all different type of sounds occurring, count the number of sounds taking place in 2 minutes. It could be any sound like sound of fan, moving sleepers, car horns, breathing etc. It will help you enhance your attention, in long term your confidence.


      * Feel free like a bird and natural by nature. Explore yourself by writing down answers of these questions-

      – Qs.) who am i?

      – Qs.) what do i want right now to be happy?

      – Qs.) what do i want to do in my life?

      I would like to tell you that human mind can do anything by believing in what you want, So keep believing in yourself and practice the skills to be more confident. Please do take out 30 minutes everyday for your mental health. Live a positive and happy life.

      Thanks and have a cheerful day.

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